Tuesday, June 24, 2008 - The Blogging Blues!

(Picture at right: Reading from the latest novel in the Hallelujah Love series,  Love Like Hallelujah, at this years Book Expo in L.A.)

Okay y’all…I got the blogging blues. Yes, I know, grammatically it’s “I have”, but my feeling is “I got”…like you’d say in a blues song, about something low down and dirty, or a somebody-done-me-wrong country song.

It’s not that anybody’s done me wrong or that I have the blues. Quite the contrary. Life is good and getting better. Only thing is…I’m busy as h&%^#! And here’s the crazy thing: I feel absolutely sure that I should be doing everything I’m doing right now: finishing my second romance novel, editing my first to send back to the publisher, and my most endearing project right now…acting in a play called A More Perfect Union, inspired by Obama’s and Rev. Wright’s speeches on race and religion in America. (I had to do it y’all…I’m a huge supporter and this is just one of the ways I’m trying to help a brothah get elected!) All this while still trying to stay in shape by working out, eating right, hang with my honey and get a little R&R.

The thing is, there are only so many hours in the day and before I knew it…I’d missed two weeks of my Tuesdays with Lutishia (I just came of up with that name for my blog…like it?). So for anybody out there wondering where I’ve been with the blogging beat…now you know. Busy living the blog instead of writing about it…but I miss hearing from you!

What about y’all? How do you balance the busy lives that most of us lead? And especially the parents…I am continually amazed at the work that gets put out by people with kids! And how do we stay balanced through it all? And get enough rest?

I’m still trying to figure it out…while I try and get back into the weekly groove of Tuesdays with Lutishia. See you next week!

Tuesday, June 3, 2008 - History in the making: Obama clinches Democratic nom today!)

But this isn't the title of today's blog: it is...
To BE: The Book Expo and the Barack Expectation.

(But before I get started, the picture at right is of me and Jack Canfield, founder of the Chicken Soup for the Soul series and one of my inspirations. Like him, I initiated by first book deal at the Book Expo.)

Okay, let's go...

First of all, I’m still recouping from this year’s Book Expo America that went from Thursday night until Sunday afternoon at Los Angeles’ Convention Center. It was fabulous, as usual. I always enjoy catching up with fellow authors, meeting fans, and networking with those in the industry who hold it down for us writers. At the risk of leaving somebody out (which I probably will so just forgive and hollah at a sistah so I can say wuzzup), I must send a shout out to just a few of the people with whom I was blessed to connect: Selena James, Adeola Saul and all the rest of the Kensington gang (my publisher), fellow K-pals Vanessa Davis Griggs, Donna Hill, Gwynn Forester, Anna J., Earl Sewell, Victoria Rowell, Monda Webb, West Coast Biz, Jack Canfield, Ann Hopson, Naleighna Kai, Freedom Speaks, Sandra Kitt, Barbara Walters, Garrison Keeler and “Nikki”. Also much love to Tony Rose and Amber Communications for holding it down in the African American Pavilion and to AALBC’s Troy Johnson and MosaicBook’s Ron Kevanaugh for their marketing expertise. Check out a few pics from the weekend on myspace, including my reading from the current Hallelujah Love Series installment, Love Like Hallelujah. Enjoy!

In writing the above I was and am reminded of how important other people are to our lives. Not just to our business or to a particular project, but to our everyday existence. In a world that thrives on independence, I am reminded of the importance of INTER-dependence. In short…we need each other, and that’s a good thing. I need you, you need me, we are one big family…okay, let me not get maudlin. But you get my point. We’re in this thing together…this world, this life. And for having you as one of the ones sharing mine…I’m grateful. Thank you.

And on a final note: I can’t blog today without a comment on Barack Obama. As we all know today, Tuesday, June 3, 2008, will hopefully and finally be the official day this once obscure senator from Illinois can declare that he is the Democratic Party’s presumptive nominee for president of the United States of America! Honestly, I didn’t know if the true possibility of electing a Black man as president would happen in my lifetime. I remember when Jesse Jackson ran in 1988 and while that moment felt significant, the numbers never put him in serious contention for the highest position in American government. And let’s not forget that Congressman Shirley Chisholm was the first Black woman to run for president in 1972. But Barack? Y’all, he really has a chance. Are we about to do this? Are we about to do the d-thang and put the first Black family in the White house? Tonight may be yet one more step on the road to that possibility. And for being alive to watch it happen, and to share the moment with my 70-something mother and my 80-something aunt…again…I am grateful.

What about you? Who are you sharing your moments with today? Let them know they matter…

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Is Sex Nasty?

          When I began the “Hallelujah Love” series with a book called Sex In The Sanctuary, I knew the title would raise a few eyebrows. But even after being raised in the church and the daughter of a preacher, I was still taken aback at just how offended that one, small word, s-e-x, was to some people. 

       This week I’ve been fascinated by the fallout that occurred when one online magazine to which I’m a subscriber promoted a book on erotica. People were offended, subscriptions were cancelled, opinions were hurled and judgments made. All of this based on the cover alone—with no excerpt.

     During a recent internet radio discussion on love scenes in romance novels, the moderator asked the participating authors how we conveyed these passionate moments while “keeping it clean.” I believe that’s the first time I openly asked the question, “Is sex nasty?”

      At first blush, this question may appear elementary but over the course of the past several years I’ve found that it “taint necessarily so.” My thoughts regarding sex have evolved from thinking it nasty, to believing it natural: a wonderful gift from God to be shared and enjoyed by consenting adults, in whatever ways bring them pleasure. But, trust, I didn’t always feel this way.

     It has been medically proven that a healthy sex life is, well, healthy. A December, 2007 Newsweek article entitled Six Reasons To Have Sex Every Week, by Temma Ehrenfeld, cites among other things that regular sex raises the body’s level of the immune-boosting antibody immunoglobin, which fights colds and flu. Regular love-making helps to relieve headaches and stress, promotes regular menstrual cycles, and raises a woman’s estrogen levels promoting healthy hair and supple skin. In other words…regular sex keeps us look young!

       But like I said this thinking for me was an evolution. Like many women, especially Black women who grew up in traditionally religious households, very little was said about sex and what little I did hear was not good. My sex education went something like this: keep your panties up and your dress down. Sex, translated fornication in religious circles, was a sin, together with adultery, homosexuality and later, in more “forward-talking” congregations, oral or anal copulation, masturbation and pornography were also included in the sexual list of “thou shalt nots.” And even though according to scripture the marriage bed is “undefiled”, anything beyond the missionary position, including those acts listed above, was viewed with raised eyebrows. These acts went beyond being “nasty,” they were and for many still are viewed as vile, depraved, twisted, unnatural and, of course, unholy. One first lady went so far as to say that sex was strictly for procreation, and never for pleasure.

       To be fair, not all churches take this hard line. Several years ago I heard a prominent LA minister and biblical scholar say that when it comes to the marriage bed “anything goes,” and further stated that the Bible takes no clear position on masturbation. It is now rather common to hear pastors make sensual overtures regarding their mates, talking of Victoria’s Secret purchases or even listening to Marvin Gaye during romantic moments. I believe this healthier, less judgmental approach to sex is slowly gaining ground in religious circles, but we, especially in the Black community, have a long way to go.

       For the most part sex is still a taboo topic both in and out of religious circles. Judgment and condemnation commonly accompany any discussion on homosexuality, lesbianism, masturbation, oral sex, etc. so we simply don’t talk about it. It’s the big elephant in the community that we refuse to openly acknowledge. Adults won’t talk to each other about it, children feel embarrassed or afraid to come to their parents with questions, and schools are limited on the types of sex education classes they can offer. But one look at statistics shows that while we may not be talking about it…we’re doing it. More than seventy percent of Black children are born to single mothers, one in three Black teenagers have been diagnosed with an STD, the highest and fastest growing group of AIDS cases is Black, heterosexual females and forty-two percent of Black women have never married but a large share of this percentage are sexually active. Because of the silence on the subject, however, much needed information about protection, prevention and positive perspectives on sexuality is not being shared. Too many people believe sex is nasty, not natural, something to be hidden and literally done in the dark. As a result everyone suffers: our children, our community, our churches, ourselves.

      I would not be so arrogant or ignorant to think my opinion is the end-all be-all on sex. I believe that much like the act itself this is a personal issue of which the interpretation of “correctness” should be left up to the individuals involved. What works for one couple may not for the other, what feels “right” to one might be a “sin” to another, and so on. I do believe, however, that it is past time for all of us to have an open, honest, non-judgmental, non-condemning, ongoing dialogue on sex and sexuality, and that this should start early with age-appropriate dialogue with our children. 

       In the early 90’s a female rap group, Salt-N-Pepa, made a suggestion. They said, “let’s talk about sex.” I think they were on to something.  What do you think?

The design of this site isn't the most "blog-friendly" however, I welcome your comments. Please post them to the link below and I will add them here. Blessings!

Post your comment here: LutishiaLovely@yahoo.com  

Please leave at least a first name and city you're posting from....thanks everybody!!!
 

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Welcome everybody to my new blog! 

I don't know why it's taken me so long to get into this whole "blog" thing; and I'm not sure how much I'll get into it now...but here goes. I have a small one on my myspace page, but I'm going to try and update this one regularly, every Tuesday morning after returning from my 6:00am step class. I plan to talk about whatever's on my mind as well as what's on yours; whatever's going on in both the literary and real world. I'm just gonna type and flow and see what we end up workin' with...!

This was formerly my "bookshelf" page and while I'll continue to promote and showcase other authors and their books, the truth is, I've been too busy writing to read much lately so the page stayed stagnant much of the time. The last book I read was by new author Trice Hickman, called Unexpected Interruptions. It is an excellent read; one I recommend. So as I meet new authors and read good books, I'll be sure and pass it on...as well as info on my stuff....of course! :)

This week is all about finishing up my second romance novel. The first one in this new genre for me, Lies Lovers Tell, will debut in October, '08 under my romance pseudonym, Zuri Day. 

Why a pseudo? Several reasons: 1) it separates these books from the Hallelujah Love series; 2) it gives those who may connect my name only with Christian-themed fiction to pick up a fresh book by this "new" author; 3) it creates a multi-tiered business, taking my eggs out of one basket so to speak and 4) it allows me to have several "brands" or types of writing. So for all of you Lutishia Lovely fans...meet Zuri Day! She'll have her own website and myspace page soon. Yes, y'all, I'll address her in third person as a totally different "persona", not hard for this former actor (well, I'm still an actor, just haven't performed on stage lately) and, truth be told, owner of several personalities depending on the time of day and...the time of month. ::wink, wink::

If you haven't already, check out the excerpt for the latest novel in the Hallelujah Love series, A Preacher's Passion. The official release date is January, 2009 but it will start selling on Amazon in December, with pre-orders starting as early as September, according to my publisher. I'll keep you posted!

Lastly, y'all, my mind is on the primaries today in Indiana and North Carolina. Aside from voting, this is the first time in my life I've been truly active politically, volunteering on phone banks and travelling to get out the vote. The picture to the right is of me in TX, helping with the caucus in an Austin suburb. It was a crazy, great experience. Contrary to popular belief, that suburb I worked (Pflugerville) and eventually the state went to Obama! Yes, Hillary won the popular vote by 4 percentage points, but he won the caucus and the most delegates! I'm a part of the Obama-nation and it's been really interesting how crazy its gotten. What do you make of Jeremiah Wright? I mean why in the h*&%^ did he have to do what he did and say what he said right before the primary? Don't get me wrong, I'm all for freedom of speech and right to expression. I just think he could have waited, that's all. At any rate, I'm praying for a miracle and that Barack pulls off both states so we can stop the madness. And for any of you readers who are Hillary fans...it's all good. I believe in Divine Order; whatever happens is what's supposed to...

The design of this site isn't the most "blog-friendly" however, I welcome your comments. Please post them to the link below and I will add them here. Blessings!

Post your comment here: LutishiaLovely@yahoo.com  

Please leave at least a first name and city you're posting from....thanks everybody!!!